You Don't Know - The Stories We Tell Ourselves

“You’re not good enough.”

“You’re not smart enough.”

“You don’t have the qualifications for this position; you shouldn’t try.”

“Tough market, maybe you try something else.”

Imagine someone you trust or love telling you these things when you have an idea or goal you want to chase. How would it make you feel? What would you think? Most of these things are often said to you, sometimes multiple times a day, by someone who should love you the most, and you might not even realize it. Can you think of who it is?

I’ll give you a hint: You see them every time you look in the mirror….

That’s right, it’s YOU! It’s me. It’s us. How we speak to ourselves can keep us from reaching our full potential and moving forward based on our limiting beliefs. Limiting beliefs are those beliefs that have been shaped and developed by yourself or others based on the world around you. They develop from previous experiences, social environment, influences, and how we are raised.

Think of an anchor to a ship. Before my time in the Navy, I thought that when a ship dropped anchor, it didn’t move. It was bound to one exact spot. However, movement still happens. The vessel will move, based on the current, and will often circle the anchor. So movement exists, but there is no progress. That’s how limiting beliefs work. We can move around in our lives, but if we hold on to that limiting belief, it provides a false sense of progress. Thus, we are left wondering why we feel stuck or why things keep coming back around. It’s because we haven’t let go of that limiting belief!

Knowing this can help you realign with what is important to you and identify what has been potentially holding you back from achieving a goal, whether it’s a promotion, weight loss, a trip, a new career, starting a business, or just being more engaged with your family.

Limiting beliefs held me back for quite a while when I started my business. Now and then, they still creep up, but understanding what they are, when they tend to show up, and altering my perception about them helps me move past the obstacle and opens my aperture to see the opportunities in front of me.

At this point, you might be thinking about some limiting beliefs that you have in your own life, or how they’re at least showing up, maybe not. One thing to know is that not everyone has the same limiting belief. Further, the messaging and how or when they show up might differ even if they have similar limiting beliefs. Here are a few examples, but limiting beliefs are not restricted to these areas:

• Imposter Syndrome — Feelings or thoughts about how you got to where you are and that it might be through happenstance, coincidence, or luck. Feeling like a fraud is prominent with this limiting belief.

  
  

• Being Perfect — In a world where social media tends only to post the highlights, there might be thoughts or feelings surrounding what you are capable of, and that people will judge you for what you do. Looking for perfection can keep one from getting started.

  
  

• Education—Yes, certain levels of education, certifications, or credentials are required in some positions. Still, people often do not pursue something because they believe they have to have a specific certification, title, or degree.

Changing Your Perspective

Understanding that limiting beliefs exist and what ones might be in your life is the key to creating lasting change that will help you build a formidable life. For growth and success, it is vital to be able to alter the language surrounding these limiting beliefs and how your life can be transformed by identifying and working through them. This is where working with a coach can help you to unlock the potential hidden by messages that have been developed.

If you’d like to learn more about limiting beliefs, have questions about coaching, or learn how to recognize and shift how you show up, you can schedule a call with me today to build a life that is aligned and helps you find your flow!